Emotional investments are probably the most important investments we make. They demand more than mundane monetary advances. And yet they’re most underrated in terms of how they’re not even recognised as investments per se.
We take the emotions others express towards us for granted. We have this double standard of not expressing our emotions but expecting the other person to tell us their deepest secrets. It’s really greedy to ask for 100% of anything, much less human emotion/trust, but we still do it and consider ourselves exempt from the same rules that we expect the whole world to abide by. And god save the soul that dares to point this out to us.
Emotions are an investment. Demanding emotion from somebody demands emotion in return. And like with any investment, profits and/or losses are inevitable. And it is at this juncture that we must celebrate the profits, and deal with the losses, both while respecting the emotional investment that the other person has made in us.
For those of you thinking I just broke up/am in a new relationship, a. I’m Indian, and b. I’m Indian, so, no. All this came to me yesterday when I finished the Half Bad trilogy by Sally Green (I highly recommend it, and yes this article may have been leading up to recommending it :P). I realised just how much I’d invested emotionally in those characters when I just couldn’t stop crying after I closed the book, which I’d done only once in the past (The Hunger Games Trilogy, Suzanne Collins). It made me really think about the contrast between emotional investments and unconditional love. By definition, unconditional love means no expectations, no T&C applied. And yet by my understanding, emotions are an investment, which do entail expectations/conditions. So how come an integral part of unconditional love contradict its premise? And is the concept of “no expectations/conditions” a construct?